Although I'd rather not admit it, I have big self-esteem issues. I mean, it's actually starting to sink in that I need to change or I'm going to lose those closest to me. I figured out what needs to change but I'm unsure of how to go about it.
Things that need changed:
1) I need to stop putting myself in check. I am sick of worrying about whether or not what I say or do offends/pisses off anyone.
(I'm a good person, I don't need to worry about that)
2) I also need to stop feeling worthless when I end up having an evening alone. I mean, not everyone can hang out with me all the time. I just need to give myself something to do on those days off.
(This means buying arts and crafts, going through all the junk in my room and donating things I don't need to the Salvation army, buying books, and of course, renting movies)
3) Finally, I need to set a better budget. Let's see, I make about 250ish every two weeks. Means I make about 500 a month.
Also, I have a $150 car insurance payment and $100 in car payments each month.
250. I need to learn to stop buying clothes and other stuff I really don't need and start saving.
I also need to remember to spare about $50 for gas.
Well, after all that's said above. I'm actually pretty happy. Since I've realized this, my relationship with Matt is going alot smoother. Sure, there are bumps, but there are always bumps in relationships.